‘Creative Fear’

September 24, 2019, 5:53pm

Dear, Diary

Sometimes I think, for just a moment, that it would have been easier to remain asleep. I’m well aware this is an illusionary cop-out presented by the perceived fatigue experienced by my ego, but, nonetheless, it is what came up for me this afternoon in the midst of a high-vibrational writing session – one in which I wanted to break from, but knew I had to continue to dance with.

What a blessing creative flow is, really. We all, as the creators we all are, seek it out, search for it, and long for it, but then once we are living through it it can feel almost painful – a true process of birth. A miracle of life?

I’ve carried the notion for a little too long that my voice wasn’t audible – that the words I was sharing were not resonating. This egoic belief made a few attempts to drag behind me for a little while, creating the semblance of deadweight on my coattails, but now I’ve let it go to play on its own. Sometimes it skips behind me, or even alongside, and we walk the path together – no, not hand in hand, but in acceptance of one another’s presence.

The sensation of the creative spirit – the muse, of sorts – has been running up, down, and through me today.

As I breathe in, I know I must continue on as fear keeps beckoning me to stop. I am thankful the flow is too great, too graceful, too gentle for me to let go.

So I’ve been writing, creating, and working, not questioning if anyone hears, but knowing that a message shared is infinitely more powerful than a message kept to one’s small self. For the expression of one is indeed simply an extension of the collective spirit.

Within that, my soul knows that these words will find who they are looking for, and my message to you is this: whatever you are being called to dance with right now, keep going even if the fear is tempting you. I’ll be cheering you on.